The Internet at the Speed of Thought

15 Ways to Never Get Divorced

at 2:20 pm | By

Things to definitely not do when you tie the knot

Dan Pierce, a man we think we would get along with pretty well, was sitting with his family on the eve of his little sister’s wedding. They were going around in a circle giving the sister their best marriage advice, but when it came to him, he realized, after two failed marriages, he wasn’t really one to give, or even have, any advice on a successful marriage. Then he realized,

“Hey. I don’t have marriage advice to give, but I have plenty of ‘keep your marriage from ending’ advice (two equivocally different things), and that might be almost as good.

And so, that night, I sat down and wrote out my ‘advice list’ for my little sister. You know… things I wish I would have known or done differently so that I didn’t end up divorced (twice). After writing it, I thought maybe I’d share it with all of you, too.

I call it my ‘Ways I Blew My Marriage’ list. Also, for the list’s sake, I am just going to refer to ‘her’ instead of ‘them’ even though they almost all were true in both marriages.”

Ways I blew my marriage

Source: Imgur @MadVillainousDave

Hilarious and insightful all at the same time

Don’t stop holding her hand

Hand Holding

Source: Imgur @MadVillainousDave

Holding hands is super healthy for relationships. It releases oxytocin which is a hormone that make you happy, and lowers your blood pressure, which is one of the major contributors to heart disease.

Put a Face On


Source: Imgur @MadVillainousDave

Seriously though, guys… farting in front of a girl is always a turn off. No matter how comfortable you are around each other.