They just can't even
No More Babies
Hey, parents of an only child considering having one more, know that I just split an M&M in half.
In half. (@ValeeGrrl)
5: Daddy can I tell you a secret?
Me: Sure thing, buddy.
5: *Grabs my face and whispers* I just pooped and I didn’t wash my hands. (@DaddyJew)
My toddler woke up upset because he couldn’t find his glasses, but what really set him off was when I told him he doesn’t even wear glasses. (@WorkingMom86)