They say pictures are worth a thousand words, but these might be worth a million. What in the world were these people thinking?
Picture this: Your day starts out just as every day does. You wake up and you can’t stop thinking about all the trashcans you’re going to stack into a giant pyramid today. That’s the only thing on your mind and truly the only thing that should ever matter to any reasonable human being. You’re stacking them on top of each other one by one and you think to yourself “This is the greatest day of my life.”
As you get closer and closer to your garbage can pyramid’s peak, you get more and more nervous. With every placed can the tower becomes slightly more unstable, but that doesn’t stop you. You laugh in the face of fear. Fear is nothing to you. You are fear. You were born in it… raised in it. You put that last can on the top and your brain immediately tells you that you should backflip off of that motherf**ker like it’s nobody’s business. You’ve never done a backflip before in your life, but there’s no getting away from that voice in your head. You bend your knees and thrust them up while bending over backward. You’re in mid-air, you did it. Nothing can stop you now. You’re doing a f**king backflip and no one can say you’re not. But wait… what’s going on? Your legs just gave out at the end of the thrust. You can’t believe it. “The giant pyramid of flimsy-ass trashcans wasn’t stable?” you say to yourself in your head as you tumble. Your friend recording the whole thing lets out an “OH!” and that’s when you know it just got real. You land flat on your back, the pain sets in and you realize you probably shouldn’t have done that dumb backflip. “Stupid trashcans,” you think to yourself in your head. BAM! They heard you. One of the cans took offense to what you thought and smacked you right in your head. That’s what you deserve, moron.
This photo is a classic. We can assume that the event is a wedding or some type of ball because of how everyone is dressed, but one thing we are sure about is the fact that no one wanted an alcoholic beverage poured on them that night. When looking at the photo, we’re not even really sure where the drink is coming from. Is it the guy with the blonde hair and the white shirt in the background, or is it someone who isn’t pictured just throwing up his hands at first sight of a camera in the area? The poor guy in the middle with the glasses on is about to get a face full of alcohol, and not in a good way.
The worst thing that can happen at a formal party event is something spilling all over your clothes. Maybe you’re eating some delicious spaghetti and meatballs when one red sauce smothered noodle slips off of your fork and right onto your white dress shirt. Maybe you take a sip of that delicious red wine and some just happens to dribble right off of your lips and onto your pants. Or maybe, just maybe, your friends call you over for a great photo opportunity and right as you all get your best smiling faces on some jackass decides to come in the back and “accidentally” raise his glass a little too quickly. He ends up pouring the whole glass of his secret mixture of vodka and Mountain Dew straight onto your face and all over your clothes. Now your night is ruined, and you have to leave the party early because you don’t have a change of clothes. Even better, you were wearing contacts and now you have alcohol burning in your eyes. You take your contacts out because you can’t take the pain, and now you have to drive with your face as close to the windshield as possible and your eyes squinting the whole way home. Thanks a lot, Greg.
Here’s a lesson for everyone reading this: Don’t stick your fingers near wild animals! I don’t care what kind of animal it is, from a tiger to a tiny cute little duck, keep your hands to yourself! This girl clearly learned that the hard way… or did she? The picture was taken at the perfect time, but we’ll never actually know if the duck got its bloodthirsty beak on her waiting finger. We won’t ever know the true story of the duck’s thoughts either.
Was he trying to bite her because she was being super annoying and taking a million selfies in front of him? Maybe she just kept following him around because she couldn’t quite pick out the selfie that had angles and made her look the best. He finally got sick of it and decided to fight back. “Go for the finger,” he thought in his head, remembering the advice from his passed father. He took the opportunity and ran with it… and then ran off with her finger.
More than likely the duck was simply acting in self-defense. She got just a little bit too close and he took it as a threat. When you’re around wild animals like this, no matter how innocent and cute they look, it’s best to be very cautious about how close you’re getting to them. The little duck may have even thought her finger was a nice, big, juicy worm just wiggling around right next to his face. Is there anything better than having dinner brought straight to your face and not having to hunt for it? Not to him… CHOMP!